Common Ways We Drift Out of Presence¶
What patterns most often distract us from presence and healthy conscious living?
The list here can help us consider unhealthy patterns that tend to pull our attention away from presence. It can help to ask others what patterns they notice us doing compulsively.
Note that the same behaviors that are unhealthy when done compulsively may be healthy and appropriate in other contexts. Distraction can be a healthy and appropriate method for releasing obsessions or overreactive feelings. The question is whether we act with presence and a whole-body-OK. So, for any unhealthy pattern, instead of just judging the behavior as bad, we can consider what healthy versions would look like and when they would be appropriate.
- analyzing
- evaluating
- reviewing
- comparing
- surveying
- questioning
- studying
- figuring it out / puzzle-solving
- interpreting
- intellectualizing
- explaining
- proving
- justifying
- rationalizing
- persuading
- announcing
- talking
- venting
- getting wordy
- apologizing
- compromising
- arguing
- complaining
- correcting
- criticizing
- contradicting
- interrupting
- whining
- blaming
- judging
- activism / protesting
- getting righteous
- bragging / boasting
- defending
- protecting
- controlling
- intervening
- managing (micromanaging)
- policing (including self-policing)
- worrying
- approval-seeking
- looking interested
- smiling
- being a "good" student/employee/partner/etc
- getting embarrassed
- avoiding
- getting shy
- concealing
- censoring / self-censoring
- accepting
- asking for / listening to advice
- doubting
- dismissing
- being sarcastic
- ignoring
- withdrawing
- waiting
- rising above it all
- procrastinating
- getting distracted
- spacing out / zoning out
- daydreaming
- feeling inadequate
- being disorganized
- being misunderstood
- getting confused
- getting busy
- getting overwhelmed
- multitasking
- working
- taking care of others
- cleaning
- organizing
- planning
- preparing
- anticipating
- making lists
- making notes
- collecting
- counting
- editing
- rehearsing
- getting serious
- trying hard
- disciplining (including self-discipline)
- doing it right / perfectionism
- ritual
- checking phone
- checking other things
- emailing
- texting
- internet surfing
- social media
- engaging with AI chatbots
- listening to podcasts
- reading - news and more
- watching tv
- shopping
- sexual activity/porn
- spying
- gossiping
- joking
- getting silly
- playing
- acting / putting on roles
- gaming
- gambling
- exercising
- rushing
- praying
- dieting
- eating
- drinking
- drugging
- sleeping (in)
- staying up late
- waking up early
- coughing
- itching/scratching
- body aches
- biting nails
- injuring yourself / self-harm
- getting sick
Adapted from the Conscious Leadership Group